By Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby: You told “Upset Parent,” who objected to the lack of moral supervision at college: “When a grown child goes off to college, parents cannot expect the authorities there to assume guardianship of their children’s sexual behavior. “
Abby, the college authorities have a responsibility to provide living quarters that are free of drugs, alcohol and a brothel atmosphere.
Every generation of college administrators has probably found enforcing dormitory rules a headache, but the current generation is the first to “turn the zoo over to the animals.” Our young people are being exposed to sexual stimulation at an age when their hormones need no nudging. Why should we make it easy for them?
Look into the matter. You will be shocked by what is going on in 95 percent of our colleges. Men and women live on the same floor, share the same bathrooms and showers; they are openly sleeping together, and nobody blinks an eye! – Another Upset Parent
Dear Parent: After reading the mail this week, I feel more like Rip Van Winkle than Abigail Van Buren. I confess I was not aware that the situation is exactly as you described it in all but a very few colleges in our lovely liberal land. Read on:
Dear Abby: I live in a university town and I frequently visit other universities as a speaker. I am usually housed in the women’s dorm. There is no security. I have gone to the ladies’ bathroom at midnight and found men and women showering there – together! Reputable hotels do not permit visitors who are not registered to remain overnight in rooms or hallways. A university dormitory should be run at least on the level of a reputable hotel – not a hot sheet place in the red-light district. – Appalled, Norman, Okla.
Dear Abby: I was barely 18 when I went away to a state university. I didn’t drink, smoke or engage in sex with the men I dated. Living in a college dormitory was a new experience for me. There were no restrictions whatsoever. My roommate’s boyfriend would spend the night in her bed, which was only inches from mine, so I had to find somewhere to sleep or just stay in the same room with them! I requested a change of roommates, but my new roommate was no better than the first. When I complained to the authorities again, I was told: “If you keep this up, you are going to get a reputation for being difficult!”
Years ago, college students were not allowed to have their own apartments on campus because the college authorities wanted to keep their moral standards high. Today, the students who want to keep high moral standards must move out of the college dorms and get their own apartments. – Disgusted in Massachusetts
Dear Abby: We sent eight children to college over the last 24 years, and I have witnessed an unbelievable change in the so-called house rules.
Underage drinking, partying, sex, pot and drugs have become so common and “acceptable” they arc seldom cause for disciplinary action. Abby, please make some surprise inspections of some college dorms. You will be surprised. -Father of Eight
Dear Abby: I agree with “Upset Parent” concerning the free and open sexuality in college dorms. I believe college authorities should take some steps to control immorality in the dorms.
First, they should eliminate coed dorms. I strongly object to your statement that “If young adults are inclined to fool around, they will find a way to do it on their lunch hour.”
If young men were kept out of young ladies’ quarters and vice versa, it would certainly help to correct this situation.
How did we ever get into this mess, and where will it end? – Harrisburg Parent
Dear Parent: We got into this mess when the rules were so consistently ignored they might as well not even have existed. And it will end when enough students and parents get that message to the college authorities.
Guardian of Truth XXXII: 13, p. 397
July 7, 1988