Truth Magazine

By Weldon E. Warnock

Ogden Nash once said, “A family is a unit composed not only of children, but of men, women, an occasional animal and the common cold.” Families are still composed of children, an occasional animal and the common cold, but in almost seven million households a mother or father is missing, either by divorce, desertion, incarceration or death.(1)

America is experiencing a single-parent explosion. Twenty-three percent of all families in the U.S. are. single parent families and if current trends continue, 60 percent of all children will live in a single-parent home for some period of their lives by the year 2000.(2) In 9 out of 10 cases of single parents, the mother is the custodial parent.

Problems Encountered

The problems the single parent faces are multiple, among which may be depression, worry, loneliness, self-concern, guilt, anger, and the welfare of the children, specifically, the effects of single-parent rearing, the effects of divorce on the child, dangers to the latch-key child, school performance, adequate day care and custody and visitation rights.

The economic consequences of divorce can be equally devastating as the emotional fallout. After a divorce, mothers who have not been working usually have to find employment, and if they have young children, child care -immediately. Those who have been working already often have to give work a higher priority, perhaps working longer hours and living on half their previous budgets. Child-support payments are too frequently inadequate and poorly enforced.(3)

Dr. Michael Jellinek, a psychiatrist, wrote: “Indeed, the parents whom I’ve seen handle divorce well are those who can put the breakup in perspective and get rid of their angry feelings toward the ex-spouse. They do as much as they can to maintain the routine of their children’s lives by making sure the child keeps up with his or her music lessons or Sunday school or sports. They don’t let themselves become immensely guilty. They continue their own leisure activities – exercise, socializing, as much as possible.”(4)

Those wondering how children fare in one-parent households can draw on a growing body of professional advice and evidence, much of it discouraging. Sociologist Amitai Etzioni, professor at George Washington University, said: “In all my professional and personal experience, I have not seen a single child who did not suffer to some degree, physically or psychosomatically, from divorce.”(5)

On the other hand, Dr. Jellinek said, “Eighty to ninety percent of children recover from the initial shock of divorce in about a year. If there’s no ongoing hostility between the parents and if the child has a positive relationship with at least one parent, most children adjust well to their new situations.”(6)

Behavioral Guidelines

You who are in the single-parent category may be asking, “Where do I go from here?” A lengthy article by Neal A. Kuyper appeared in Pulpit Helps (January, 1983) on “The One-Parent Home.” Mr. Kuyper was a single parent for a time due to the death of his wife. He offers seviral guidelines for behavior in single-parenting. He suggests:

1. Believe Your Child Can Adjust. Accept the fact that most children have a great deal of ability to adjust to a oneparent home.

2. Take Time to Listen. Children often hunger for conversation with a parent who is not pre-occupied with other tasks.

3. Share Your Child’s Hurt. Accept some of the anger which will come.

4. Do Things Tbgether. Talk freely about money, household chores, and family activities. Bring to these areas some positive excitement. “Tonight let’s celebrate. We are ahead, and we are going out for pizza.” That is welcome news.

5. Help Your Child With Homework. This is the child’s main occupation.

6. Attend Church Together Regularly. Regularity of attendance gives continuity to their religious instruction and a stability to their lives.

7. Don’t Use the Missing Spouse As a Weapon. For example, Kuyper says if the spouse is deceased you do not say, “Mother would want you to be a good boy” or “You ought to live as your father lived.” If the spouse is divorced, try to keep on friendly terms.

8. Make Life Fuller Through Hospitality. Make the home a place for others to visit and enjoy. That may mean having the children’s friends sleeping overnight. Celebrate birthdays with friends and relatives.

9. Find Activities Which Develop Needed Self-Dignity. As an adult you may need to rethink your life and find some activities which give, you self-esteem and dignity apart from the children. Some persons have taken classes in night schools. Others have developed new areas of interest in homemaking, service in community, and service within the church.

In addition to the foregoing guidelines, another important one is – be yourself Let the children know you love them, but also let them know you have special needs for yourself.

What We Can Do to Help

As Christians we must take a vital interest in and a s . concern for the welfare of our brothers and sisters in Christ, as well as all men. Single parents have burdens to bear that we can share in and help carry. Those might be:

1. Providing some physical needs, like food, clothing, medical expenses, assisting in paying the utilities, etc. The church from its treasury may (and should) help in this area when the ex-spouse will not help at all or adequately, or there is no immediate family to help or it won’t help, like parents, brothers or sisters.

2. Keeping the children so the single parent can have some free time.

3. Picking children up at school when the parent has to work or keeping the child when sick so the parent may work. Generally, grandparents, brothers, sisters, aunts or uncles do this, but occasionally, friends must do it.

4. Take children to special events to help the parent and for the children’s enjoyment, like ball games, wholesome movies, fishing, skating, bowling, etc. Include the single-parent (and children) in your social functions.

5. Help the mother maintain her car, like oil and filter changes, greasing, rotating tires and minor mechanical repair. This constitutes a big savings when some of the men in the congregation can do these things for a sister.

6. Repair washer, dryer, stove, furnace, electrical and plumbing problems, and a number of other things around the house.

7. Assisting mother during worship in taking care of children. Sometimes a single mother may have two or three small children and she needs help. Of course, this would also include the father who is in this situation.

Other things could be enumerated where we can also practice pure and undefiled religion (Jas. 1:27). There are many good works that most all of us are in position to do.

Trust in the Lord

Finally, and importantly, may the single-parent, as well as all of us, put his/her trust in God and the Lord Jesus Christ for his/her every need. Realize that:

1. God sees. “For the eyes of the Lord are over the righteous” (1 Pet. 3:12). “Are not five sparrows sold for two farthings, and not one of them is forgotten before God? But even the very hair of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows” (Lk. 12:6-7). God sees our every need.

2. God hears. “If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?” (Matt. 7:11)

3. God understands. “O Lord, thou hast searched me, and known me. Thou knowest my downsitting and mine uprising, thou understandest my thoughts afar off” (Psa. 139:1-2).

4. God provides. Paul wrote, “but my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ “us” (Phil. 4:19).

5. God cares. “Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved” (Psa. 55:22). “Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you” (1 Pet. 5:7).

6. God helps. “Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness” (Isa. 41:10). “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble” (Psa. 46:1).

We sing the beautiful song:

My Jesus knows when I am lonely,

He knows each pain, He sees each tear;

He understands each lonely heartache,

He understands because He cares.

Single parents can be healthy and happy people and raise healthy and happy children. We who are not single parents can make their job easier by letting them know that we understand and care.(7)

Endnotes

1. Being a Single Parent, Andre Bustanoby, p. 1.

2. Good Housekeeping, September, 1988, p. 126.

3. Ibid.

4. Ibid., p. 144.

5. U.S. News & World Report, Nov. 28, 1983, p. 58.

6. Good Housekeeping, September, 1988, p. 144.

7. Being a Single Parent, Andre Bustanoby, pp. vii-viii.

Guardian of Truth XXXIII: 12, pp. 378-379
June 15, 1989

By Harold Fite

“Television is a dominant voice in America, and is a formidable teacher of children” (Eli A. Rubinstein, American Scientist, December 1978).

Children watch approximately 32 hours of TV a week. One fourth to one half of their waking hours are spent watching television. Over 98 percent of American households have at least one television set. A family may not have indoor plumbing, but will have a TV. By the time a child graduates from high school, he or she will have spent more time in front of a television set than in a formal classroom. Sleep is the only thing surpassing television viewing as a time consumer!

The influence of television over our children is tremendous! The networks and some sponsors deny it, but the evidence is overwhelming. Companies would not spend millions of dollars on commercials unless they thought they could influence people to buy their product. Children, on an average hear 400 commercials a week. It influences them on what they wear, eat, and how they entertain themselves. Children are in the process of forming their character and are at an impressionable age. They are great imitators, and they are receiving from TV, values which are directly opposite of those we would want our children to believe in and practice.

Several weeks ago, four young boys sat on a curb in front of the church building shouting obscenities to the passers by. The pleading of adults went unheeded, as more abuse was heaped upon them. Those disrespectful, arrogant, vile youths know that the law protects them, and they dare any adult to lay a hand on them. Seldom does it do any good, to go to the parents. Parents usually rule in favor of their children.

Where do these kids of tender age learn such filthy language? How can one so young be so hard, insensitive, and void of respect for others? Some learn to spew forth profanities from their parents, and others from their peers, but in my judgment the real culprit is television! Producers of TV shows are putting curse words in the mouths of children they are directing. Profanity has increased among children as it has grown and become commonplace in television programing. Children watching TV are treated to a steady diet of four letter words. It becomes “cute,” the “in thing,” and provokes a few laughs, expresses irreverence, and provides a shocking effect on others. And in a perverted way helps to establish one’s independency – a “don’t care attitude.” It’s smart and gets attention. Many of the phrases are identical with those heard in movie houses and on television. One can’t constantly take this trash into the mind without being affected.

The influence of TV cannot be limited to bad language. What about violence? Is there a relationship between television and aggressive behavior? Experimental studies support the view that viewing violence increases the likelihood of children engaging in aggressive behavior.

If we have encountered violence, we know it is to be more sickening than thrilling, but simulated violence is dramatic, exciting, and entertaining. Children may find it difficult to distinguish between fact and fiction. It encourages our children to perceive as normal and real that which fits the established fantasies of our society. Actual crimes have been committed as a result of seeing it on TV.

Television also presents a distorted view of sex. It encourages sexual immorality. That which is pure becomes harsh, hurtful, and manipulative. It glorifies sex among the unmarried and presents it as the norm. Children are even used in sexual scenes. Homosexuality is dignified.

Dr. W. Cody Wilson, past executive director of the U.S. Commission on Obscenity and Pornography, after seeing most studies on the subject, concluded that “there is a positive connection between moral depravity and pornography.” A man in Chicago, after seeing a sexually stimulating movie, and having dragged his victim off the street and into an alley, said, “I had to rape somebody!”

A 17-year-old in Atlanta, standing over the nude, stabbed, dead body of a 24-year-old woman confessed that he had committed the crime, down to the last detail, of a movie he had seen two weeks previously.

Parents are not immune to the influential power of television. It has changed parents’ concept relative to rearing children. The TV has become the baby-sitter, the magic storyteller, and the educational and entertainment center. Children are treated like adults, left to make difficult decisions they are incapable of making. Discipline is not maintained. Parents have accepted the sexual permissiveness of their children. Sex among unmarried children is recognized as normal by the parents (even providing pregnancy preventatives for their children). Homosexuality is accepted as an alternate life style. Families no longer eat together, and when meals are consumed it is in front of the TV. Materialism is stressed and the Bible and religion are ridiculed. All of the above and myriads of other things have appeared on family oriented shows. True moral values are being compromised and undermined while “brain-washed” parents, not only allow it to happen, but being mesmerized by the power of television, contribute to it.

A child may not curse, become promiscuous, or go out and kill someone because of watching TV, but I am concerned with the gradual conditioning effect it has on them. It becomes a part of the whole picture of what we think. It effects how we view people and things. Sin becomes no longer exceedingly sinful. We cease to be outraged by it. It desensitizes us. Children have a basic need for protection from these adverse influences of television and parents must fulfill that need.

The cliche, “garbage in – garbage out,” applies here. We are to protect our hearts from anything that would pollute our minds. “For as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he” (Psa. 23:7). Evil comes from the heart, and out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks (Matt. 12:34,35; 15:1619). To think evil is to be evil (Gen. 6:15). To think good is to be good (Phil. 4:8). The Devil knows that if he can control our mind – he has us! We are to keep our heart with all diligence for out of it are the issues of life (Prov. 4:23).

Parents have a responsibility to their children to regulate TV viewing. It is destroying the moral fiber of our youth. Parents must know when to turn the set off and have the courage to do so. We would not bring alcoholic beverages into our homes, or allow visitors to use vulgar language, commit acts of violence, nor allow fornication under our roof. Yet all these things are brought into the home by way of television.

Parents must limit the time for TV viewing, and determine the content of the program to be seen. I will not presume to make guidelines for others, but whether you limit your children to one hour viewing per day and two on Saturday and Sunday, or some other plan, regulating the viewing time and content is a must.

Television does affect behavior. Control the TV!

Guardian of Truth XXXIII: 12, pp. 370-371
June 15, 1989

By Sewell Hall

There is no magic formula which will guarantee spiritually minded children. Spiritual-mindedness is the result of allowing the Spirit rather than the flesh to control one’s life. It involves spiritual values, spiritual goals, spiritual attitudes and spiritual conduct in all relationships. The decision to “walk in the Spirit” is one that each individual must make for himself; parents cannot make it for their children. “So then each of us shall give account of himself to God” (Rom. 14:12).

This is not to say, however, that parents are without influence in determining the choice their children will make. Theirs is the opportunity to be the greatest influence of all, but this opportunity must be seized and guarded or it will be lost.

Parents Must Be Spiritually Minded

Children are much more likely to become what their parents are than what they claim to be. Children see behind the facades that parents erect for the outside world to see. They know what their parents really are – their real motivations, their real affections, their real attitudes, their real goals. When parents are seen to be truly spiritual in these things, their teaching will be effective; but when parents try to teach children to be what they are not, their teaching is not only ineffective, it is repulsive and repelling.

Children do not expect spiritual perfection in their parents but they do (and have a right to) expect sincerity in pureuit of perfection. When spiritually minded parents do fail,. they humbly confess their failure rather than rationalizing their mistakes. Rationalizing carnality, under any circumstances destroys respect for spirituality and sets a precedent for rationalization by the child when he is carnal.

Parents Must Purpose Spiritual-Mindedness

Spiritually minded parents understand that spiritual-mindedness is the only truly essential goal to be achieved in the rearing of their children. Since God’s purpose in creating them is that they might “be conformed to the image of his Son” (Rom. 8:29), this alone will determine their success or failure in life; and this alone will determine their eternal destiny.

Rather than harboring a pessimistic faithless resignation to the probability that a child will be overwhelmed by the godless influences of this generation, parents must determine before the child is born, even as did Hannah, that “I will give him to the Lord all the days of his life” (1 Sam. 1:11). Though humbly stated, theirs must be the sentiment of Joshua: “As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord” (Josh. 24:15).

Such a goal must remain before parents constantly. It is not enough to write it on the front page of a Bible or to display it as a plaque on the nursery wall. It must govern every decision that will affect the child.

This goal is not easy to maintain. Our children are under constant pressure from their peers to conform to “this world” and they in turn put pressure on us for decisions that will permit it. We do not like to deny them any pleasure and we do not want to see them suffer embarrassment. Furthermore, our own pride may so delight to see them popular or successful in the eyes of the world that our decisions regarding their dress, their entertainment or their companionships will be affected by it. We may cherish so highly the reflected glory of their performances on the athletic field or on the stage that we will agree to their participation in activities and groups (and even finance their education in colleges) where spiritual influences are almost nonexistent and negative influences prevail. It is easy to think that just one decision will not make that much difference, but rearing children is a day-to-day and decision-by-decision process. We cannot afford to make even one choice that does not reflect our goal of spiritual-mindedness. We may not always be able to determine what our children do, but we can determine what they do with our approval.

Parents Must Train for Spiritual-Mindedness

It is important that children know from their very infancy what goals their parents have in mind for them. They must know that they are sanctified to a special role in life – the service of God. They learn this, not simply by being told, but by seeing this purpose in their parents’ decisions and by seeing the reactions of parents to their conduct. In early life especially, children look to their parents for approval and they learn quickly what pleases them most. When they see that parents are more pleased with accomplishments of a spiritual nature than with those of an academic, social, or athletic nature, they know what their parents really value. Parents cannot and should not make all the decisions for their children. Mature individuals are “those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil” (Heb. 5:14). Parents must oversee and guide the use of those senses. This means very early helping the child to face decisions with the question, “What would God want me to do?” More often than we would expect, the child comes to a right conclusion. This is the time to praise the child for his decision and to encourage implementation of it. Then when the child does what is right, commend him heartily. It is urgent that we give the child full credit for making the decision and let his reward be the favor of God. If the child makes a wrong decision, of course, we may have to veto his choice and tell him that there are some things in God’s word that he doesn’t yet understand, but that someday he will understand and be glad he let his parents guide him, since that is also God’s will. This is far better than shouting at a child, “You do it because I said to!”

Parents Must Control Influences

If spiritual-mindedness is control of the mind by the spirit rather than by the flesh, then parents must control the influeces that mold the thinking of their children – “as he thinketh in his heart so is he” (Prov. 23:7). Such control must be both negative and positive. There must be a careful effort to prevent the child from absorbing carnality through television, movies, music, books, magazines, and, above all things, companions. This will demand self-discipline in parents and constant vigilance and even some “policing” of the children. We must not suppose, however, that this alone will secure our children against carnality. – We must surround them with spiritual influences so that there will never be a vacuum calling for fleshly satisfaction.

First and foremost must be the Holy Spirit’s influence through the word. It is not incidental that Paul could write to so fine a young man as Timothy and say to him, “From childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Jesus Christ” (2 Tim. 3:15). Reading Bible stories to children is a good beginning. Then as they grow older, parents need to read and discuss the Scriptures with them. If you begin early enough, they will love the attention and later treasure the memories.

If there is to be a television in the home, it should be in a family room where parents know what is being watched at 0 times. Wholesome educational and entertaining programs can be watched together as a family; other use should be severely limited. See that good reading material is available in the form of good books and wholesome magazines for children. From infancy, let them hear good records and tapes of hymns, Bible reading, and good sermons being played in the home, as well as good wholesome secular music. Any parent who considers these suggestions burdensome, needs to go back and read the earlier discussion of the necessity of being spiritual ourselves.

Teaching done by the church can be a significant help to parents. Parents should use their influence in the church to encourage good Bible teaching and then support it by seeing that the children are present and that lessons are well prepared. In addition to what they learn from classes, children can learn from sermons. Enroute home, parents can pass the time by asking children about the preacher’s sermon. Commend them highly for every right answer. Take advantage, too, of gospel meetings in neighboring congregations. At an early age when children like to go with their parents, a tradition of attending gospel meetings can be formed. What a joy it is to see whole families even taking journeys of several miles to hear the gospel and meet with brethren!

Good friends are a major factor in spirituality. Parents should make whatever sacrifice is necessary to see that their children visit and entertain other children from spiritually oriented homes. You can even share your own Christian friends with your children. When you have gospel preachers or other spiritually minded Christians in your home for dinner, include the children at the table and in conversations. Christlike men and women have time for children, but the relationship must be formed while they are small. Our children consider several gospel preachers and their wives among their closest friends. When they are a little uncertain about advice their parents are giving them and turn to such friends for counsel, how can we object? And how can we express fully to such men and women, our gratitude for their help?

Parents Must Pray

Finally, if our children are to be spiritually minded, prayer must be offered daily for the help which God alone can give. Let the children hear you pray, asking this above all things. Teach them to pray for it. It will affect your own attitudes; it will keep this goal before the children; but most of all, it is the means by which you can obtain the help God has promised. “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him” (Jas. 1:5).

Guardian of Truth XXXIII: 12, pp. 362-363
June 15, 1989

By J. Wiley Adams

There is considerable sensitivity surrounding the subject this writer has been assigned. Many mothers have a tendency to take issue with any sermons or material presented on the subject. Not a few husbands will join their wives in taking exception to such teaching. Would it surprise you if we were to declare that many of these sensitive people are preachers, elders, deacons, and their spouses? Why is this so unless such instruction strikes a nerve somewhere and it is possible that we have indeed hit “pay dirt” as it relates to the matter under discussion?

Let us further state, before going into the matter at hand, that we are not against working mothers. That is not the issue. Properly modified, all mothers as well as fathers, ought to work. What we are really discussing is the effect, or impact, it has on our children when mothers work outside the home environment. Do they have a right to do so? I believe, personally, that there are some allowable circumstances that would not only permit a mother to work outside the home, at times she might even be required to do so. All of this being true, it does not mitigate against the basic role of mothers in the home, which is to be “keepers at home” as required in Titus 2:5.

Under the headship of her husband, who is charged with the responsibility of providing for his family, she is to “guide the household” (Eph. 5:22,23; 1 Tim. 5:8,14). This requirement is always true whether there are children or not and whether they may be at home, in college, or married and moved away. It is also true when there is just a husband and wife left in the home.

The truth of the matter is this. Many mothers works outside the home for no better reason than that they elect to. Evidently some do not concern themselves with whether or not it is right for them to do so. Career women are the order of the day and for some mothers in the church a business career is their top priority. Such are in need of getting their priorities straight.

When mothers leave the home to hold down a secular job without due cause, they put a strain on the whole household. A favorite excuse is “we need the money.” But very often that is not the case. What about the children and her husband? Small children particularly need their mother in the home. But, we rush them on through life and put them into day care centers or hire a baby sitter and often pay more out for such services than the wife brings home in her paycheck. The children are put on the regimented schedule, as is the rest of the family. Such schedules can be hectic and nerve-wracking for all concerned. Instead of the home being a place of security, warmth, and well-being, the very opposite is true. This virtually makes the home a “filling station” with self-service and somewhat a “bed and breakfast” affair (if indeed there is any breakfast). In the case of school-aged children, very often they have to get themselves off to school as best they can. Many leave an empty house and have to return to the same house which is still empty. Mom and Dad are both gone. Such children are provided a house key and have been properly named “latch-key children.” It is not good for the children to be at home by themselves. For one thing, it is lonely and depressing. For another it is unsafe. They are wide open to all kinds of dangers, including child molestation, assault, robbery, and so on.

For still another reason it allows them to have too much latitude in what they may choose to do. With no supervision they may elect to go down the street to visit friends (good or otherwise), they might go up to the mall and “hang around” with the bunch or waste their quarters on the video games. They might decide to invite some “friends” over to the house for trial smoking, drinking, drugging or sexual experimentation. Not a few illegitimate children have been conceived in one of the bedrooms of such a home (?). Under such circumstances, with no supervision, one can only hope that some spiritual training has come through and that they will respond to such.

A further consideration is that of the TV and VCR which most homes have. In the case of the TV, there may be several around the house. They have free reign to turn on anything they want to. We well know that much of what is shown on TV these days is not fit to see. With the introduction of the VCR, rented films are part of the pattern in many homes. The children can rent these either themselves or through a friend and can gain access to pornographic-type material as easily as buying a comic book. You say, “Well, my children are not that kind. We have never had any trouble with them. ” It is to be hoped that this is true. However, this is simplistic and ignores the circumstances. Small children and teenagers need a mother in the home to keep things running smoothly and to give the children a sense of security that all is well. A mother who is unwilling to provide this for her children is scarcely the mother the Scriptures talk about.

Then there is the after work hustle. Stop by the store, go get the children from the sitter or daycare center, rush home, get out the quick food, put on a load of clothes, take a shower, to relax, husband comes in, things are a three-ring circus, the children begin to wish the parents had not come home with all the confusion. Things are piled up around the house, everybody does his own thing (as they say), and on and on it goes. Sound familiar?

Many families never sit down all at the same time for a leisurely meal. One writer of women’s books recommends that a mother should provide a home-cooked meal “at least once a week.” We can do without that kind of advice. The table serves not only as a time for the meal but can be a bonding time for the whole family. It can be a special time for togetherness. Children can put such times in their memory banks as a time, to be cherished. Alas, quite often, mealtime is a nightmare of nervous excitement and pressure to hurry up and get finished so we can clean the table off and wash the dishes. Is it any wonder that many children get ulcers? Surely you have heard the fad-talk these days about something called, “quality-time” and “quantity-time. ” We have borrowed such phrases from sociologists, psychologists and humanistic counselors. Just what are they talking about? Making appointments to be together destroys the spontaneity that should characterize such time regardless of the amount of time under consideration. Brethren, something is wrong when families have to make appointments to be together. Togetherness ought not to be a stereotyped, just this amount of time and no more type of thing. I can never recall my parents setting up an appointment with the children to be together. But, boy, did we have togetherness! It just happened because my Dad made the living and Mama stayed home and kept things going. We had all kinds of time together in the normal course of a properly operated home. When we have our priorities right, mothers being keepers at home, guiding the household, fathers providing the family income, families together at mealtime, working together, performing tasks together, just all being Christians together, praying together, studying together, laughing together, caring, sharing, dear friends, you have a combination that cannot be improved upon. This is because it is God’s arrangement.

Mothers, your children need you at home. Be available when they need you. There can be no substitute for the guiding hand of a godly mother working in conjunction with her husband in the best interest of the home as God would have it to be. Emergency, sickness of a husband, widowhood with children, etc. are the exceptions. We are talking about the rule, not extenuating circumstances. Mothers in Christ, we beg you to think about all we have written here. You know it is right.

Guardian of Truth XXXIII: 12, pp. 366-367
June 15, 1989